Blood and Mud

Video: South Africa 9 - 28 British Lions, highlights

British Lions: Five reasons why losing 2-1 is better than losing 3-0

1.  Saving Face.  Unless you are competing in a "Who is Most like Rob Andrew" competition, the smaller the losing margin the better.  Always.

2.  History.  When looking back at this tour,  losing 3-0 will make it sound a lot like 2005, which would be a gross injustice to everyone involved.

3.  Nausea.  Should 2 occur, I will be forced to remember Alastair Campbell and The Power of Four and will then belm all over my laptop

4.  Whitewash.  If you cannot win then avoiding this is always the goal (unless you are a Daz salesman).

5.  Effect on Accident & Emergency Capacity.  I, like many many others, will be in the pub watching the game and if they lose 3-0 it will put a downer on the rest of my day.  I'll then be forced to switch from beer to brandy, which will make me lairy;  I'll get into an argument with the wrong bloke over a beermat, he will be forced to stove my head in with one of his giant tattooed hands, thus leaving me to clog up an already overworked A&E on a Saturday night. So, Lions, if you won't win for your fans then at least win for the poor doctors and nurses at Wythenshawe Hospital.

bloodandmud.com podcast, episode 3

This week we wallow in some Lions misery, have an in-depth look at Bastareaux-gate, and round up all the other news.

Use the player below to listen to it on your computer, right-click here to download it, and don't forget you can subscribe to us on itunes as well.

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Quick Poll: Why has Lote Tuqiri been sacked?

We are getting word through the wires that the ARU have confirmed that winger Lote Tuquri has been sacked, but as yet no reason why is forthcoming.  I throw it open to you to decide what for.

Vintage Lions Video: Jeremy Guscott's drop-goal 1997

It's been a terrible week, so let's cheer ourselves up and pretend it's 12 years ago instead!  We'll all put on some Adidas Samba trainers and check shirts, pick a side in the Blur vs Oasis argument and watch Jeremy winning the series vs South Africa. 

What's the alternative? Living in the now that's what, with a global recession, Cold-fucking-Play being one of the biggest bands in the world and staring at a series loss.  Where would you rather be?

Burger's attempted blinding gets less of a penalty than evading VAT

by Richard O'Hagan

What can you do in eight weeks? That’s almost certainly not the question that Schalk Burger is sitting at home thinking to himself, as he contemplates the better part of two months on the sideline for an offence which he still contends that he didn’t admit. 

The interesting news coming out of South Africa today is that the Springboks intend to appeal Bakkies Botha’s two week ban, but not Burger’s. This suggests that someone has, at last, woken up to the seriousness of Burger’s actions. 

Assaulting another player on the pitch is, in England and Wales at least, still a criminal offence. There have been plenty of occasions down the years where players have been jailed for such offences – Chris Stephens of Bridgend and Wales was one, and only last year an amateur player, Gareth Glyn Jones, received 12 months in prison for biting off a part of an opponent’s ear. 

That Burger claims that he didn’t mean to injure Luke Fitzgerald would be irrelevant. The offence of Common Assault can be committed recklessly as well as intentionally. In this country, Burger would be looking at the possibility of 6 months in jail, rather than just an 8 week ban from playing. 

In fact, the law would regard the sentence handed down to Burger as risible. For example, you can be jailed for up to six months if you fail to pay customs duty on goods worth over £1000. Six months is also the tariff for repeatedly abstracting electricity, or for evading payment of VAT. And if we are talking about bans rather than serving time, remember that acquiring 12 points on your driving licence will get you barred from the road for six months. Doesn’t seem fair, does it?  

Schalk Burger may well consider himself hard done by, but in reality he’s a very lucky man indeed.

Big-name journalists want to kill the Lions, via wrong-headed argument

In his daily column in The Guardian, chief sports writer Richard Williams has chosen this day to launch another one of his typically ill-researched and nonsensical diatribes, this time about the "fact" that the Lions cannot compete with professional international teams and are therefore doomed to lose forever.  Honestly, you would think a man of his age would be more grown up than to write such deliberately inflammatory nonsense as this wouldn't you?  It's the journalistic equivalent of playing knock and run.  Here's one classic quote:

"To an objective eye ... the facts and the statistics remain persuasive: the Lions have now lost three tours in a row ... and there is no telling when, if ever, the tide might turn."

Let's apply some modicum of analysis to this shall we? Firstly, on winning and losing.  The fact is that since the 1970s the Lions have always lost tours on a fairly regular basis, and the last time that the tourists lost three tours in a row was after the 1971 victory vs the Kiwis and the famous 1974 "Invincibles" victory in South Africa.  After that came losing tours to New Zealand (1977) where they even lost to bloody Fiji! South Africa (1980) and New Zealand (1983).  The 1983 tour was a particular low point, a 4-0 drubbing, with Clive Woodward, then just a lowly England centre, describing it years later as "an unmitigated disaster".  There was no professionalism then, so what was to blame?  The Trade Unions?  They got the blame for everything else back then

Continue reading "Big-name journalists want to kill the Lions, via wrong-headed argument"

South Africa 28 - 25 Lions: A dissection in seven soul-splintering parts

Kearney & Rees depressed, AWJ hates everyone in the world, particularly Ronan O'Fucking Gara

So it's all over.  The series is lost and the third game next week looks about as appetising as Beanfeast served up on Shane MacGowan's face with a side order of cheesy-peas.  But despite my only desire at present being to weep quietly into my chest while the black wings of depression beat into my soul, I have instead decided to try and analyse what went wrong.  WARNING: Reading this may make you feel greater sadness,  listen to Leonard Cohen, some of the more morose Smiths output, or worse still a Keane album.  You have been warned.

On the set piece defence
What was going on there then?  As someone once said, fool me once and shame on you, fool me twice and Bryan Habana will score a try that sends many people into fits of rage. At least I think that is how it went.  First phase late pop pass moves executed as well as the Boks did those two are to be admired, but the second one was a real kick in the teeth for the Lions defence after JP Pietersen had pierced the line with such ease earlier.  What it shows us more than anything is just what a game of inches rugby can be.

Continue reading "South Africa 28 - 25 Lions: A dissection in seven soul-splintering parts "

Video: South Africa 28 - 25 British & Irish Lions, Second Test highlights

First of all, what a game of rugby this was; secondly, what a series this has been so far; thridly, does anyone give a shit about the match next week? 

Whatever, this was a game for the ages, an absolute corker with everything; muscle, passion, tries, last-minute drama, heroes and villains.

Relive the whole thing here, if you can face it.

British Lions team vs South Africa, Second Test

Well, well, well.  McGeechan has gone ballistic with the changes here, with every single change that people have suggested - without expecting them all to happen - being made by the Lions.  The one major disappointment has to be O'Gara on the bench instead of James Hook.  But, in a way this is a positive selection, suggesting that the Lions management expect the game to be won before O'Gara comes on to settle things down, rather than gambling on a more mercurial matchwinner on the bench should they be in need of something special.  Let's hope the gamble is the right one.

British and Irish Lions team to play South Africa at Loftus Versfeld, Pretoria on Saturday, 1400 BST:

R Kearney (Leinster and Ireland); T Bowe (Ospreys and Ireland), B O'Driscoll (Leinster and Ireland), J Roberts (Cardiff Blues and Wales), L Fitzgerald (Leinster and Ireland); S Jones (Scarlets and Wales), M Phillips (Ospreys and Wales); G Jenkins (Cardiff Blues and Wales), M Rees (Scarlets and Wales), A Jones (Ospreys and Wales), S Shaw (Wasps and England), P O'Connell (Munster and Ireland, capt), T Croft (Leicester and England), D Wallace (Munster and Ireland), J Heaslip (Leinster and Ireland).

Replacements: R Ford (Edinburgh and Scotland), A Sheridan (Sale Sharks and England), A-W Jones (Ospreys and Wales), M Williams (Cardiff Blues and Wales), H Ellis (Leicester and England), R O'Gara (Munster and Ireland), S Williams (Ospreys and Wales).