Blood and Mud

Rugby video: RBS 6 Nations; Wales 15 - 17 Ireland

The last five minutes of the epic clash at the Millennium Stadium. 

The RBS 6 Nations table doesn't lie is a lie

In between hurling pool balls at people in Cardiff pubs and pissing on trains, curiously orange Gavin Henson is quoted as saying that "the [Six Nations] table doesn't lie".  As usual, I disagree with him.

While I can see the point he trying to make - that ultimately Wales were not very good, hence they finished fourth - he is missing the main point: England finished second.  Many England fans are using this as a stick to beat many doubters with, they see it as proof positive that they are not as bad as people make out, and thus neither are Wales as good.  However, these people are idiots - England finishing second is proof positive that the table does lie about many things. 

Three teams finished on six points this year, with England gaining the silver medal due to superior points difference.  This was garnered against an Italy team who gave them 36 points due to one of the worst selection decisions in the history of sport, ever; and a sublime performance in 45 incredible minutes vs Looney Lievremont's Scattergun Selection Circus.  

I look at it that three teams finished in second this year, each with different reasons for it: England are clawing their way out of a long period of malaise; France have a coach with selection policies that inspire as much confidence as a tissue paper raincoat; and Wales lost their self-belief and sense.  Or to put it another way, England started SHIT and ended up GOOD, France and Wales were the other way around.  One thing England can be pleased about is that they conceded the least number of points, even with their disciplinary problems, that is something to build on and credit to Mike Ford, who has copped a lot of flak recently.

What this also demonstrates is that Ireland picked one of the better years to win a Grand Slam: every other team lost at least two games each, which indicates the inconsistency of what they were facing.  My friend James over at The Rugby Blog sees this year as the start of something special for Ireland, I think if we consider the above, there are some grounds to dampen the enthusiasm.

10 Things We Learned... from the RBS 6 Nations

1.  None of us should be that confident of a Lions win this summer

2.  Gavin Henson remains some form of curiously orange antichrist

3.  The tournament wasn't of great quality - of 30 halves of rugby, only about 5 were memorable.

4.  Warren Gatland needs to shut his mouth in future

5.  Eddie O'Sullivan wasted five years of Ireland's talent

6.  Martin Johnson looks like he might have some clue what he is doing

7.  Scotland cannot possibly get any worse, then again it doesn't look like they can get any better either.  Time for the fans to accept what they are: a minority interest sport in a nation with a small population

8.  France are no nearer to being something resembling a team than the were two years ago when Marc Lievremont was let out of the asylum to manage them.  I bet Laporte is giggling his arse off in his new plush government office.

9.  Italy are going backwards at an alarming rate, and their only hope appears to be the new academy, whose first attendees are just about to graduate.

10.  It has taken about four days for people and media to start quietly rubbishing Ireland's Grand Slam as being won in a year when everyone else was either inconsistent or garbage.

RBS 6 Nations: Bloodandmud.com Team of the Tournament

Congratulations to Ireland, who managed finally to throw that giant, 61-year-old monkey from their collective backs in Cardiff yesterday - a well deserved win in what has been a strange tournament this year.  Italy went backwards for the second year running, they will hope that their academy starts bearing fruit soon; England started off looking as SHIT was we expected, before somehow becoming GOOD; Wales suffered from some congenital loss-of-form disease that grew worse every week; Scotland were nowhere near as bad or as good as people like to think, but they still are not winning enough games.  Ireland were the most consistent team in what, it must be said has been a relatively poor year - their Slam has something of the Wales win in 2005 about it - but it is not my intention to damn them with faint praise, their achievement is one of which to be justly proud.

Here is our team of the tournament, feel free to hurl abuse in the comments

1.  Gethin Jenkins - A rock in the new Wales destructo-scrum and a revelation in the loose.

2. Jerry Flannery - No real outstanding candidates in the 2 jersey, but Flannery was the strongest.  Lions selectors will not be rubbing their hands with glee when they sit down to decide on this one.

3.  Phil Vickery - All the obituaries of the big man's career were written a little prematurely.  Slight discipline problems, but that should not tale away from a mammoth effort in an often losing course.

4.  Paul O'Connell - Wasn't exaclty ripping up trees every week, but such is his quality that he doesn't have to.

5.  Ian Gough - Many would go for his partner Alun Wyn Jones, but this fella is the usung hero of the Wales engine room.

6.  David Wallace - Whether playing at 8 or 6 or 7, a man anyone would want in their side

7.  Martyn Williams - Still the best breakaway in Europe by some distance.  Different class

8.  Sergio Parisse - The only Italian who looks like and international rugby player, and a bloody good one at that.  Harinodoquy misses out for going missing in the last fortnight.

9.  Mike Phillips - Another position where options are weak, Phillips stands out in a field of general mediocrity.

10.  Ronan O'Gara - tackles like a balsawood weeble, but his game management is still second to none. His constant probing for territory was one of the main reasons Ireland won.

11.  Tommy Bowe - Always dangerous, runs lovely angles and blistering pace

12.  Riki Flutey - Top tournament try-scorer.  This may be seen as the tournament that he finally became and international player, and was central to everything that was good about England, particularly in the France Game

13.  Brian O'Driscoll - Like Vickery, far too many people lamented his passing too soon.  A powerhouse in defence, attack and as a leader; if there was ever any doubt about his Lions place it has firmly been put to bed now.

14.  Maxime Medard - What no Shane Williams?  If it was based solely in talent it would be Shane.  Based on performances alone, Medard shades it.

15.  Lee Byrne - Still a class apart.  Makes you wonder where he's been until last year.

RBS 6 Nations preview: Wales vs Ireland; Cardiff, Saturday, 17:30

According to you lot, this game is almost too close to call, with 56% of you voting that Ireland will win this match and thus their first Grand Slam since 1948, something that Keith Wood believes could be the trigger for the so-called "Golden Generation" to finally start winning consistently. 

The bookies make Wales slight favourites at 5-4, with Ireland a shade behind on 10-11, but that is the odds equivalent of a cigarette paper, very much reflecting the views of the majority of the rugby public.  On the one hand, unlike Wales, Ireland have never managed to deliver when it really matters and this game matters more than any match this squad have played in their international careers. But, on the other hand, Wales have been getting worse with every passing week in this championship, so it can be expected that they will play on a par with Gwent Dragons come Saturday.  It must a great disappointment to their fans that it has taken about a fortnight of poor performances for Wales to lose confidence quicker than a cocky bloke in a French bar who realises he has just spilled beer all over Olivier Merle

There are few surprises in either team, and there are some fascinating individual match-ups: Shanklin vs O'Driscoll; Jones vs O'Gara; Kearney vs Byrne; O'Connell vs Wyn Jones.  The results of some of these could very well decide Lions Test places.  The key could be the subs, where Ireland, in the likes Stringer, Murphy and Leamy certainly look to have more experience and impact than Wales, which may prove decisive in the closing stages.

Ireland will give Wales a lot of ball, hoping they will kick.  Wales will be more likely to keep it in hand at home than in their display with the boot last week vs Italy - that was as brainless as it was poorly executed - but their confidence is so shot that a couple of bungled attacks from deep could see them putting leather to leather pretty sharpish.  Ireland will certainly hope so.

I think Ireland will have enough to finally reach the promised land, while Wales and Gatland will have to write this year off as simply one of those difficult second seasons.  

b&m.com prediction: Ireland by 5

Spotter's badge:  Camera lingers on an octogenarian former Ireland player in the crowd, closely followed by Eddie Butler saying, "It's been 60 years since he won that elusive Irish Grand Slam, how dearly he would love to see it again today"

Teams;

Wales: Lee Byrne; Mark Jones, Tom Shanklin, Gavin Henson, Shane Williams; Stephen Jones, Mike Phillips; Gethin Jenkins, Matthew Rees, Adam Jones, Ian Gough, Alun-Wyn Jones, Ryan Jones (capt), Martyn Williams, Andy Powell.
Replacements: Huw Bennett, John Yapp, Luke Charteris, Dafydd Jones, Warren Fury, James Hook, Jamie Roberts.

Ireland: Rob Kearney; Tommy Bowe, Brian O'Driscoll (capt), Gordon D'Arcy, Luke Fitzgerald; Ronan O'Gara, Tomas O'Leary; Marcus Horan, Jerry Flannery, John Hayes, Donncha O'Callaghan, Paul O'Connell, Stephen Ferris, David Wallace, Jamie Heaslip.
Replacements: Rory Best, Tom Court, M O'Driscoll, Denis Leamy, Peter Stringer, Paddy Wallace, Geordan Murphy.

Vote! Do Ireland have the pods to go all the way?

There is much talk of "destiny" and the like around the Ireland squad at the minute.  The last time they were in Cardiff for a Grand Slam decider they were of course pasted at the hands of the Welsh.  Can they turn it around this time?

SHIT/GOOD™ Ratings: Six Nations, round 4

"Me like glass, me no pass glass, me run with glass into people until glass smashes. Me smile"

We're back!  We've put a new hamster on the wheel of the computer and it's churning through literally tens of lines of data every half hour to bring you this week's output.  Remember, everything is either SHIT or GOOD, there is no inbetween.  I have borrowed this gauge to judge most things in my life; for example, I put a pre-packed sandwich back on the shelf the other day as the excess cucumber would have turned the bread slightly soggy, therefore rendering a once GOOD lunch a SHIT one.  Anyway, to business.

SHIT
James Hook - What has happened to him?  Two years ago he was the new Barry John - without the booze and curtsying - and now he seems to the the new Barry Horne, without the perm and rubbish football career.  His performance against Italy proved once again that while his feet may twinkle, his brain is operating on a 15 watt bulb.  Kicked aimlessly, all too often ran the ball into walls of blue, and showed the kind of game management you would expect from Charlie Hodgson.  Asleep.  With blinkers on.

Andy Powell - It was only a matter of time, really.  Up until this year, he was a journeyman, a powerful lad who showed flashes of being decent before he did something either brainless or simply maladroit to ruin it all.  His move to the Blues led to those brilliant flashes being longer in duration and stronger in effect, but ultimately they were still just flashes and he has started to increasingly show what he is fundamentally: a bustling lummox.

Ross Ford - Of all the positions in the Lions Test team, hooker is the one with the least outstanding candidates so Ford was in with a great shout for the jersey.  Until Saturday.  Of all the things that creaked in a horrible second-half for Scotland against Ireland, it was the lineout that sounded like it required the most WD-40 and his two overthrows at crucial times proved costly to the team in the short term, and I imagine to himself in the longer-term.

Special mentions: Paul Griffen's hair/chops; Wales's front row; Italy's backs; Lawrence Dallaglio's forever yapping mouth

GOOD
Paul O'Connell - I have to admit that a year or so ago I thought this fella was finished, and I certainly found the Martin Johnson comparisons laughable, but I ain't laughing now.  Well actually I am, but that is because I just thought about Iain Balshaw for a second, not the Ginger Monster.  Has been immense every week, is a certain starter for the Lions and it is surely between himself and BOD for the captaincy.

Steve Borthwick - Has been SHIT for such a very long time that his name on the teamsheet was causing the kind of rage normally only reserved for the selection of Jamie Noon in the bloodandmud.com office, but his performance against France was that of a powerhouse.  How much of it was down to Simon Shaw getting through the dirty work?  I'm willing to let it go and give him the credit..

Delon Armitage - This blog's mascot finally gets a chance to show what he can do and, oh, how he flaunts it.  Credit to Jonno for sticking with him when it might have been easier to call up a more experienced man a full-back, the reward was a simultaneaously composed and electrifying showing from the Exile.

Special mentions - all the other England players; Thom Evans;  Gavin Henson, particularly for his big girly strop

Rugby video: Classic Six Nations - Martin Johnson will not shift at Lansdowne, 2003

With Jonno making his first return to Dublin as part of the England team this weekend, let's recall the occasion when he told the Irish President to do one in her own stadium.  Like it or loathe it, you can't deny it's a ballsy move. 

RBS Six Nations Poll: Have your say

Two weeks gone and two teams emerge to lead the way for the Grand Slam.

Who is your money on, the current champions Wales or the resurgent Ireland under new coach Declan Kidney? 

Or maybe you reckon that neither of them will have the required minerals to defeat all-comers and so they may win the championship, but the GS is out of reach. 

Let us know in the poll.

The bloodandmud.com 6 Nations Fantasy League Showdown! Round 2 update

Another round, another chance for triumph/embarrassment, depending upon your performance, in the bloodandmud.com 6 Nations Fantasy League Showdown!

In the former category, the top three of Matelot's Marauders (156pts), Kingfisher Irish (152pts) and Capital Dragons (146pts) remains unchanged.   In the latter camp Jeremy Theobald and Andy Bradshaw must take the shame this week with scores of 63 and 72 respectively.  Abject, fellas.  

Don't forget to get your changes in before the weekend of 27th Feb.  Don't be like me and change your team before the actual teams are announced - well, that's my excuse for dropping three places anyway.